i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
