So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Randomize
