Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize