end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
