She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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