Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
We are two peas in an std pod
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Randomize
