Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
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