Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I just want to make out with him forever
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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