Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
