i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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