YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
