Dual....:-)
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
