Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Randomize
