She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
oh god was she eating orange peels again
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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