the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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