Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize
