Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
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