My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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