this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
