between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
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