Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
