I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
She told me I should be a condom model.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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