I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Randomize
