be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
do nipples grow back?
Randomize