Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
