The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Randomize
