You don't have asthma, your pregnant
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
