I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
smell my finger.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
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