ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Randomize
