I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Randomize
