I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
