I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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