New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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