How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Randomize
