I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
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