STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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