My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
