Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize
