Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
