I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
