I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Randomize
