The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
