Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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