Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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