weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Randomize
