she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize