how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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