you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
She even gives head with a lisp.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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