girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
you never un-have a 4some
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize
