Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
